Category Archives: Mindfulness Practice Blog

Snow day

February 13, 2015Mindfulness Practice Blog, My practice, Uncategorizedbefriending meditation, beginner's eye, beginner's mind, breathing space, Cambridge, compassion, crouch end, eight week course, guided meditations, healthy-living, kindness, Learn Meditation, Learn meditation in Cambridge, Meditation, Mindfulness based stress reduction course, Mindfulness course in Muswell Hill, Muswell Hill, relaxation, resilience, secular meditation, stress management, walking meditation, when did you stop dancingwifi allotment

We had a snow day the other week. It was a perfect flurry that made everything look picture perfect and yet it didn’t totally disrupt the trains and roads, so win-win all round.

On the eight week mindfulness courses I teach there is much reference from week one of the beginner’s mind. Participants are asked to eat a raisin as though they have never seen one before and then this continues in their home practice by doing a daily task with the spotlight of their full attention.

If ever there is something that reconnects us with beginner’s mind it must surely be walking to school with two kids after a snow flurry. The same old tired journey we do everyday was suddenly magical and exciting to them. The alley we traverse (often much covered in dog poo) was transformed into a Narnia-esque secret snow tunnel.

There were oooohs, there were arrghs, there were a few soggy tumbles as well but with the help of kindly curiosity I found myself quelling the urge to say ‘come on’ (surely the most overused two words on the school run?) and instead just marveled at their marveling. At moments like that I find myself thinking, ‘this moment, must remember this moment.’

It seems to me children are naturally mindful and we (society, parents, teachers, life, soft cops) squash it out of them, telling them to hurry and multi-task so we can squeeze all the things that need to be done into one day.

How wonderful it was to just take our time, marvel at the beauty of winter and, for one day at least, give ourselves permission not to rush.

Today’s total practice time: 30 minutes with the kids (it is half term)

The rush hour

January 30, 2015Mindfulness Practice Blog, Uncategorizedbefriending meditation, breathing space, Cambridge, compassion, crouch end, healthy-living, Learn Meditation, Learn meditation in Cambridge, mindful self compassion, mindfulness Bishop's Stortford, Mindfulness course in Muswell Hill, mindfulness in Crouch End, Mindfulness Meditation: Breath and Body, Muswell Hill, pausing, secular meditation, stress management, tranquility, well being, winter blueswifi allotment

I read somewhere recently that 40-somethings are often in the rush hour of their lives. The article said this is when career and child rearing responsibilities reach their pinnacles leaving those in their forties with very little free-time outside of work and child-rearing. The moniker Dual Earners, Toddler Twins (DEETs) rings very true for me and my partner.

It feels as though we have had toddler ‘twins’ for decades, though of course it has only been six years. And by definition neither of them are officially toddlers anymore nor twins. But having two young kids while trying to have a career is trying and frequently tests my mindfulness practice, let alone trying to carve out a new career for yourself at the same time.

Add to this mix the never ending story of retraining, which so many of us undertake in our thirties and forties because we realise we want something different or need something that fits round the kids, and you have levels of busy-ness unknown to our parents generation.

When my parents were in their forties they weren’t schlepping off onto training courses and retreats. You decided what you wanted to do at 18 and pretty much stuck with it. There are of course pros and cons to this model but in their forties I think they were certainly relaxing, watching TV and going down the pub more than I ever do!

I realised the other day, as I got in from London and had half an hour before needing to pick the kids up, that what I thought I should do was turn the computer on and catch up with emails and then head back out into the world even more frazzled than when I arrived. But I paused and guess what? A different idea came to mind. How about leaving the computer off, putting the kettle on and allowing myself half an hour with the paper before getting the kids?

Deep down we know that’s what our parent’s generation would have done with a spare half hour, rather than thinking their blog that has 3 readers desperately needs to be updated, on which note I down tools for lunch!

Today’s total practice time: 35 minutes (20 minutes qigong and 15 minutes self-compassion meditation)

Kids – a useful mindfulness tool!

January 23, 2015Mindfulness Practice Blog, My practicebefriending meditation, blue Monday, body scan meditation, breathing space, Cambridge, compassion, eight week course, guided meditations, haelan centre, healthy-living, Meditation, Mindfulness based stress reduction course, mindfulness Bishop's Stortford, Mindfulness course in Muswell Hill, mindfulness in Crouch End, relaxation, resilience, secular meditation, stress management, tranquility, walking meditation, well being, winter blueswifi allotment

It’s often when we need it least that illness can strike. Although saying that is there ever a good time to be ill? All week I have been catching up with my work – both from my day job and from my mindfulness teaching work that I do. Blog posts, emails, advertising, lesson planning, proof reading my new mindfulness booklet, burning CDs and labelling them – it all takes up time.

And last week I was unable to do any of these day to day tasks as I was on retreat in Lockerbie, although at times I blinked and found myself remembering Tibet and my travels there. It was a wonderful, nourishing retreat and also very hard work. And of course this week has been all about playing catch up.

My oldest has had a hacking cough all week and I have insisted she trudge in to school every chilly day so that I can get my work done. She was fine and she didn’t need a whole week off but today she looked at me and just said ‘mummy, I think I need to rest my voice’.

As a teacher I know that feeling only too well so I relented and said OK you can have today off. This caused a meltdown in my youngest who on twigging that the oldest was having a day off decided he too was so ill school was not option.

As I almost dragged him bodily into school, a forced smile on my face, and the oldest ‘ill’ one kept skipping with delight (in between hacking coughs) at the idea of having a whole mummy day at home, I recalled, or perhaps it was somewhat later, what Jon Kabat-Zinn says about kids.

Let your children be your own zen master, he advises. That way whatever they throw at you, you can take a deep breath and tell yourself this is all part of the practice!

Total Practice Time: So far today ZERO, but the intention is there!

Learning to dance again

June 5, 2014Mindfulness Practice Blogbreathing space, Cambridge, crouch end, guided meditations, haelan centre, healthy-living, Learn Meditation, mindfulness Bishop's Stortford, Mindfulness course Hertfordshire, Mindfulness course in Muswell Hill, Mindfulness courses in Cambridge, Mindfulness Meditation: Breath and Body, tranquility, walking meditation, well beingwifi allotment

In week seven of an eight week mindfulness meditation course we explore the exhaustion funnel. When teaching this class I quote from This Frantic World which says in some countries doctors don’t ask ‘when did you start to to feel depressed’. Instead they ask ‘when did you stop dancing?’. I have yet to find out which country it is that has such enlightened doctors but I am tickled by the idea that perhaps in some utopia there may be salsa on the NHS!

This is a preamble to say that dropping the things that nourish us can cause us more stress than hoped. A person may drop all sorts of ‘optional’ pastimes in the name of clearing the decks or making more time. But they then may wake up a few years later burned out and with little joy in their life. Hence the question is really when did you stop doing the things you loved and start only focusing on work/children/caring responsibilities/obsessive house renovations (delete where applicable).

The good news is that none of this is irreversible. As Jon Kabat-Zinn frequently says there is always more right with you than wrong with you. Reclaiming your life is a big part of week seven and a big part of living mindfully. Being able to ask yourself, ‘what is the best thing I can do for myself right now?’ and perhaps deciding it’s a cup of tea rather than whittling away at your seemingly endless to do list.

Today’s Total Practice Time: 30 minutes

Thursday 30th January 2014

January 30, 2014Mindfulness Practice Blog, My practicebreathing space, calm, Course, healthy-living, Mindfulness, Mindfulness based stress reduction course, Mindfulness course in Muswell Hill, Mindfulness Meditation: Breath and Body, Muswell Hill, relaxation, resilience, secular meditation, stress management, tranquility, walking meditation, well beingwifi allotment

I can vouch that this mindfulness stuff really works! I know I would say this – I am a passionate practitioner and teacher but today I had a moment or several, when I could feel such a fundamental change in my perspective. Today my perspective on several events were so different to how they would’ve been a year or so ago. First walking the kids home from school with two of their friends we see a fire engine outside our house. A while ago I would have assumed the worst and thought my house was on fire but today I felt only curiosity. The kids got to sit in a fire engine as well which was a nice start to any play date! Then the play date itself: two five year olds and two four year olds under one roof, this was the type of situation that would see me feeling stressed but today I surprised myself by enjoying it. Today’s total practice time: 20 minutes

Saturday 12th October 2013

October 12, 2013Mindfulness Practice Blog, My practicebreathing space, Cambridge, Class, Course, healthy-living, Learn meditation in Cambridge, Mindfulness, Mindfulness courses in Cambridge, Mindfulness Meditation: Breath and Body, secular meditation, walking meditationwifi allotment

I have been trying to knuckle down to writing my schemes of work (SoW) for my job in London but it seems I keep coming up with all manner of avoidance tactics. So far I have done very little. I suddenly felt compelled to have a clean out, rearrange the kids’ rooms, buy a new toilet seat. So the upside is I now have a much tidier, ordered house but still the SoWs hang over me. Tomorrow, I keep promising! I have been squeezing in practice as always. Wednesday 9th October I practised on the train and did a walking meditation. Total practice time: 20 minutes Thursday 10th I only managed two 3 minute breathing spaces! Total practice time: 6 minutes Friday 11th I made up for my slackness and made sure, alongside my regular morning 3 minute breathing space that I did a waling meditation and a pre school pick up meditation – very therapeutic when one of your kids often bolts without even saying hello Total practice time: 20 minutes Today, Saturday 12th I did yoga, Chi Qong and mindful movement before doing a sitting down meditation for 20 minutes Total practice time: 1 hour

Tuesday 8th October 2013

October 8, 2013Mindfulness Practice Blog, My practicebreathing space, Cambridge, Class, Course, healthy-living, Learn meditation in Cambridge, Meditation, meditation courses in cambridge, Mindfulness, Mindfulness courses in Cambridge, Mindfulness Meditation: Breath and Body, secular meditation, walking meditationwifi allotment

Equilibrium has almost been restored! I did spend a lot of time today faffing around, avoiding doing my schemes of work for my new classes but I managed to start the day as ever with a 3 minute breathing space. I did a walking meditation (10mins) and then did a 15 minute sitting meditation at a quiet moment during the day. Feeling very balanced! Total practice time today: 30 minutes. Yesterday I did ten minutes on the train, standing and then 15 minutes sitting during a quiet moment before picking up the kids. I also did a walking meditation for 5 mins. Total practice time yesterday: 30 minutes

Saturday 5th October 2013

October 5, 2013Mindfulness Practice Blog, My practicebreathing space, Cambridge, Class, Course, healthy-living, Learn meditation in Cambridge, Mindfulness, Mindfulness courses in Cambridge, Mindfulness Meditation: Breath and Body, secular meditation, walking meditationwifi allotment

Work, courses, kids and life in general have all been taking up my time. I made sure I did a 30 minute body scan today before even getting out of bed. Yesterday I did 15 minutes as the kids were being put to bed by the hubby, the scream fest that ensued was probably not the most conducive to meditation but true to the spirit of mindfulness, I just do it when I can. Thursday I managed 10 minutes and on Wednesday I practised on the train. I had forgotten my book which at first made me kick myself but then I decided to meditate for the whole 25 minute journey. I arrived at work feeling wonderfully collected and calm. Now when I see someone on the tube or train with their eyes closed I wonder curiously if they are sleeping or, like me, meditating. Total practice time: today 30 minutes, Friday 20 minutes, Thursday 10 minutes, Wednesday 25 minutes.

Friday 27th September 2013

September 27, 2013Mindfulness Practice Blogbreathing space, Cambridge, Class, Course, healthy-living, Learn meditation in Cambridge, Meditation, meditation courses in cambridge, Mindfulness, Mindfulness courses in Cambridge, Mindfulness Meditation: Breath and Body, secular meditation, walking meditationwifi allotment

Another busy day distributing flyers for my new course. I managed to do my 3 minute breathing space first thing, then 10 minutes on the train and 10 minutes walking meditation. Total practice time: 20 minutes

Thursday 26th September 2013

September 26, 2013Mindfulness Practice BlogLearn meditation in Cambridge, Meditation, meditation courses in cambridge, Mindfulness, Mindfulness courses in Cambridge, Mindfulness Meditation: Breath and Body, secular meditationwifi allotment

Busy day yesterday. Squeezing in a couple of ten minute meditations on the train was all I managed. I also managed to do a standing meditation while waiting for a train! Total practice time: 25 minutes Today I have no excuse except trying to advertise my new course, I have been desk bound all day. Ten minutes this morning plus my frequent 3 minute breathing space on waking up. I need to get out so will do a walking meditation to my allotment. Total practice time: 25 minutes

this mindful life

delivering mindfulness courses, living a mindful life